Wednesday, December 10, 2014

mormon women & the priesthood & gender roles in the church

a friend of mine recently posted some of her thoughts on women & the priesthood & gender roles in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, & one over-long facebook comment later I realized that I, too, have many thoughts on this subject, & I wanted to preserve them here for my own future reference. :) this is basically verbatim from my facebook comment, so apologies for any lack of organization/coherancy. I just wanted to get it out there. Also, though I hold fast to certain truths (we are all children of God, for example) this is a topic on which my opinion is constantly shifting & expanding, & I would love to hear any opinions you may have on the subject :) [for a bit of background knowledge: read up on the priesthood]


First of all, I really enjoyed this article - it was very thought-provoking, & this line is still something I think about [emphasis added]:
"Because we live in a world where strength and power have always been defined by men, many think that they must be the same as a man to be strong and powerful. The idea implies that only what a man does is of worth, and therefore, if a woman wants to be of worth, she must become like a man. This is wrong. Women should be valued for what they contribute based on their own individual and differing strengths, not based on how much like a man they may have become."
My personal feeling is that hard & fast "gender roles" are harmful to individuals, and to society. I believe absolutely that God knew what He was doing when He created us. I believe I have always been a woman & that I will always be a woman. & I believe that God has a perfect plan for each of us, and that He has & will give us every opportunity & experience we need to become like Him & enjoy the happiness He does.

I don't think that this means I am inherently nurturing, just because I am a woman. I don't think this means men are not nurturing, just because they are men. I believe that as a child of God I have a spiritual heritage that it is my job to develop, & that God will give me the opportunities I need to do that. I worry about prescribing strict "gender roles" - in my experience this can lead to men & women feeling like something is wrong with them, like they're not a "good woman" if they don't naturally love children, or cooking, or homemaking, or not a "real man" if they don't love sports or cars or lifting heavy things.

As a missionary, I often felt "holy envy" for the elders (male missionaries who hold the priesthood). They could bless their investigators, no problem, they could baptize the people they taught, & their ministerial certificate sounded a heck of a lot cooler. But I've learned that women use the priesthood in a lot of important ways. As a missionary, I absolutely believe I used the priesthood - the power of God used to bless His children - every single day. I used to be so jealous of men who could give blessings, jealous that I would never know what that feels like. Then I realized, when I pray sincerely for the people that I love & care about, it's the same thing. I can call down the powers of heaven to bless people, and I can be inspired by the Spirit to know what to say. I had profound experiences that I know were because of the power of the priesthood - God's power to bless & save His children. God can work through me just as much as through any of His sons. Women can be leaders - great leaders! I was very encouraged by the addition of "Sister Training Leaders" in my mission

I don't pretend to have a perfect knowledge or understanding, but that's where I'm at today. I strongly disagree with the idea I've heard many times, that men are naturally selfish etc & that's why they hold the priesthood & women don't, or that women are naturally giving & good & kind & so we don't need the priesthood. I don't believe that's doctrinal, & in my experience it's not accurate. God gives us what we need, but we don't always know why, & it isn't fair to assume all women or all men are a certain way, simply because of gender.

I think it's important to realize & embrace that there are multiple ways of being a woman and following God's plan. I struggle with equating "motherhood" with "priesthood." Motherhood already has an equivalent - fatherhood. If my life never includes marriage, or never includes bearing biological children, I am still a mother, and I am still a nurturer. I am still a woman of God, living out my divine role, even if I never marry. I absolutely believe that motherhood is a high & holy calling - just like fatherhood is. Of all the names & titles God could have chosen for Himself, He has asked us to call Him Father! Families are the pattern of heaven, and we are preparing for that here.

Eve was called "the mother of all living" before she ever bore a biological child. Also, it takes a man & a woman to bring a physical life into the world, and those women who are never able to conceive are not any less of a woman or any less of a follower of God. It takes a man and a woman, sealed together, to bring the highest priesthood blessings into their home. I was very encouraged by Elder Oaks talk in April 2014 about women using the priesthood. I would hope that in the future we could embrace multiple ways of being a woman in the Church (and being a man in the Church) and recognize that we are all pilgrims, doing the best we can to follow God's light & live out His plan for us

I think for too long we've thought of "nurturing" as basically "playing with 3 year olds" and giving it that narrow of a definition I think is detrimental. Leadership can be a great nurturing opportunity! We do ourselves, our families, the Church, & our communities & nations a disservice when we dismiss the valuable, nurturing aspect women bring to leadership Mothering - in whatever way you are able to - will help us develop the divine nature that will allow us to enjoy the lifestyle of our Heavenly Parents

(This was also an interesting article on the "two trees" in the garden of Eden & the complementary roles of Adam & Eve in bringing to pass the salvation of the human race.)

my thoughts from a year ago: they've evolved some, but the basis remains the same.

[another essay on womanhood i enjoyed from meginprogress.com]
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