forgiving

This I know: God is all-loving, all-knowing, and all-powerful.

Because He is all-loving, He wants us to be happy.

Because He is all-knowing, He knows what will make us happy.

Because He is all-powerful, He can make us happy if we only use our will to choose His will.

One of of His commandments designed to bring us ultimate happiness is forgiveness:

"I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven.. Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect." Matt 5:44-45, 48

Of course, this all sounds like a great idea until you're faced with actually having to forgive someone who doesn't deserve it, or love someone who persecutes you. C.S. Lewis wrote,

"I admit that this means loving people who have nothing loveable about them. But then, has oneself anything loveable about it? You love it simply because it is yourself... We have then to go on and apply the rule to all the other selves. Perhaps it makes it easier if we remember that that is how He loves us. Not for any nice, attractive qualities we think we have, but just because we are the things called selves." 

Dieter F. Uchtdorf teaches us more about how God loves us:

"Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God’s love encompasses us completely. He loves us because He is filled with an infinite measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love. We are important to God not because of our résumé but because we are His children. He loves every one of us, even those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken. God’s love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked. What this means is that, regardless of our current state, there is hope for us. No matter our distress, no matter our sorrow, no matter our mistakes, our infinitely compassionate Heavenly Father desires that we draw near to Him so that He can draw near to us." 

And the Apostle John wrote: 

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. 

Remember that God gives us no commandment unless He also provides a way for us to accomplish it. & Jesus taught, "I am the Way." 

I am by no means an expert on forgiveness or loving my enemies. I don't really have any enemies. I've been cursed, hated, and despitefully used a few times in my life, but I've never been abused or abandoned. Our Savior has, however, and He understands perfectly what each person is going through as they suffer and attempt to forgive. 

If I may, I would like to share I few helpful insights I've gleaned from people wiser and more spiritual than I.

Martin Luther King, Jr taught:

"We must recognize that the evil deed of the enemy-neighbor, the thing that hurts, never quite expresses all that he is. An element of goodness may be found even in our worst enemy... When we look beneath the surface, beneath the impulsive evil deed, we see within our enemy-neighbor a measure of goodness and know that the viciousness and evilness of his acts are not quite representative of all that he is. We see him in a new light. We recognize that his hate grows out of fear, pride, ignorance, prejudice, and misunderstanding, but in spite of this, we know God's image is ineffably etched in being. Then we love our enemies by realizing that they are not totally bad and that they are not beyond the reach of God's redemptive love."

It helps to remember the power of the Atonement. If I believe that I can change and be forgiven, then I have to believe that everyone can do the same; that nothing is outside the scope of Christ's infinite Atonement. Remember, God’s love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked. Remember that He commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. {Rom. 5:8}

It helps to remember that Christ took upon Him all sin. In 1 Samuel 25 we read the story of Abigail and Nabal. Nabal deeply offends David, so David takes his men and his swords and goes to punish him. Abigail hears what is happening and runs out to meet David. She kneels down and puts her face in the dust at David's feet and says, "Upon me, my lord, upon me let this iniquity be...forgive the trespass of thine handmaid." She is literally taking Nabal's sins upon herself, and asking David to forgive her even though she did nothing wrong. 
This is exactly what Christ does. Through his infinite Atonement, Jesus Christ literally took upon Himself all the sins of the world. When I withhold forgiveness from someone who has offended me, I'm not really withholding it from them - I'm withholding it from Him. From my Savior. From Jesus Christ, who suffered and died for me. How could I ever do that? When I imagine my Savior saying to me, "For my sake, won't you forgive them?" there is nothing to think about. Of course I will. There's nothing to forgive, nothing I wouldn't do for Him. It's just automatic. I love Him. 


Remember that forgiveness is in God's hands. I don't have to forgive the person who hurt me, that's God's job. I just have to forgive my Savior, and that comes very easy to me.

It helps to remember that the Lord will be with us. He wants us to be filled with his love. He wants us to be happy. He wants to give us peace. Remember what Moroni taught us:

"Charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endures forever. Charity suffers long, and is kind, and envies not, and is not puffed up, seeks not her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil, and rejoices not in iniquity but rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Wherefore, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love." 

Pray for the Love of Christ to fill your heart till there's no room for anything else, and He will. He wants us to love each other and to be understanding and forgiving. Corrie ten Boom, a victim of the Nazi concentration camps, said this:

It is not on our forgiveness any more than on our goodness that the world’s healing hinges, but on His. When He tells us to love our enemies, He gives, along with the command, the love itself. 

Always remember that the Atonement can cover any sin, heal any hurt, and provide us with the strength to forgive. The Lord has provided a Way :)